


What this act has brought upon us

by RecordRewind



Category: Thor (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Emotional Manipulation, M/M, Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-08
Updated: 2013-12-08
Packaged: 2018-01-04 00:31:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,171
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1074910
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RecordRewind/pseuds/RecordRewind
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>First movie. Everything has worked out accordingly to Loki's plan, he now rules over Asgard while Thor is left stranded on Earth believing he's unwelcome home. </p><p>Yet, for some reason Loki can't leave Thor alone.</p><p>He visits Thor, enjoying how Thor is now drawn to him, his last tie to Asgard. He sustains that desperate need, and feeds on it, until it turns physical. But such an addiction can go both ways, and Loki might have misjudged his own desires...</p>
            </blockquote>





	What this act has brought upon us

**Author's Note:**

> (written back in 2011 for Norsekink, now revised)

A whole year had to pass before the regent King of Asgard decided to walk the hidden paths to Midgard. He didn’t want anybody to know of his destination, a small dwelling, a “flat” as they called it, in one of that reign’s largest city. A place he had spent more time than it was wise watching. 

Thor lived alone there, he had adjusted moderately well to the life in that lowly place. Loki had watched him leave the place where Mjolnir waited, and leave the woman, honouring the promise he made to the older man.

He had watched Thor travelling, had observed the spies sent from those who now guarded the Hammer lose interest in the man who had once called himself a god, and who now was busy trying to learn a completely new way of living. Thor had never been a quick learner, unless fighting was involved. 

Now Loki watched closely with curiosity, and mild amusement, the sheer, unguarded happiness on Thor’s face at seeing a familiar face. He observed the emotion subdue as, in a contrite voice, he explained that no, he wasn’t there to bring news of Thor’s banishment being brought to an end. For a moment it looked like Thor was about to burst with anger, like so many other times before, but that moment passed swiftly as the man took a long breath and asked if their mother still hadn’t forgiven him. Loki could only shake his head in sadness.

He was invited in, to share some human drink or food, but he declined. When he turned his back, he heard Thor asking if he was coming back. Maybe, he replied.

He was sure his brother would have been counting the days.

-

Six months later. Thor’s unrestrained joy at seeing him was a testament to how frail the human world had made him, and yet it was also a supreme satisfaction for Loki, who recognized into it his own happiness when, much a naiver child, he waited for Thor to come back from some adventure he hadn’t been welcomed to join in, because he was too weak. Even if it had been his intelligence to save both of them much chaigrin everytime they did something forbid together and had to avoid getting caught. Now it felt like payback, and he had to admit he was enjoying it. A lot. It might have been worth many more visits.

-

“Will you come here again?”

“I will. As soon as the matters of the reign leave me the time to.”

“Of course. Thank you”

-

Time passed, and the visits gained some continuity. Now Loki stopped to partake in Thor’s home pitiful hospitality as they talked. Thor always asked him about everybody, almost like he feared to forget the names, the faces, of his old friends and family. Old habits are hard to die, and Loki told him stories about them, sometimes he invented them, sometimes not, more often he artfully bended the truth for the sake of a better, more interesting story. As if the lives of gods weren't interesting enough on their own to the ears of mortals. Mortals like the one Thor had become.

Loki had ordered the obliteration of Jotunheim and of all the Frost Giants, and set the Warrior Three and Sif to that task. Thor’s friends had dedicated soul and body to the task, blaming the Giants for the chain of events that ultimately brought to Thor’s banishment (and death, they thought, but Loki didn’t think his brother needed to know that last lie that would have prevented them from looking for him. And it hadn’t been easy, to weave that deception convincingly enough!). That, and the attempts of the Giants to strike a last blow to Asgard made for epic tales. Thor craved to be there as well, joining his comrades in the battle, and he knew it was only his fault if he could not. He had only his arrogance to blame. Loki could see how that tored at the other man, could almost taste his guilt and regret on his own tongue, and the bitter nostalgia Thor felt when Loki narrated him of their mother and friends. He was sure that after each visit the life Thor was trying to build there for himself felt even duller, more useless. It was all so sweet. It made him almost as eager for those meetings as his brother. Almost. 

-

One evening, as they were about to part, Loki reached to place his hand on Thor’s shoulder and felt the man almost jolt at the contact. Thor laughed it off, reaching up to pat on Loki’s hand. The god of mischief had to marvel at how eager Thor had become for some contact with him, and with everything he stood for. It wasn’t so different from the hunger he had felt not so long ago, hunger for affection, appreciation, even the smallest sign of it. Thor’s hand rested for a fraction more than necessary on the colder hand on his shoulder, and Loki grabbed and held it tight, just for a couple of seconds. He knew he would be missed even more, that time.

-

Another visit, another night. It was winter in that city on Earth, colder than Asgard would have ever been, warm weather compared to the dark remnaints of Jotunheim. Thor had drunk, more than usual, and he was in a bad, somber mood. In that moment Loki could see some of his brother’s older, proud and arrogant self re-emerge to the surface, and it made him curious. He would have liked to cut short his pretense of amiability, to suddenly turn over like a snake and spit the truth, about everything, about their mother still crying over Thor's disappearance, about their Odin still into his sleep, a sleep that had long ago stopped to be natural. Maybe if at the end he had dropped the last bit of news that they weren’t really brothers and that he was a hated Frost Giant, Thor wouldn’t have even paid attention to that. 

Would have he been broken, completely, by the revelation of Loki’s deeds, been left gaping, tearing up like a child in the cold? Or would have he lashed out in useless fury, maybe even tried to attack Loki? How laughable would that have been!

But there was more fun, more satisfaction to be drawn from that situation, Loki reasoned to himself, He wasn’t going to throw it all away. Not yet. Instead, he stood up from his chair, drawing a look around the small room, as he prepared to head off. While wearing his elegant coat, he stopped to give a sad glance to the other man.

“I fear my visits are doing you more harm than good, brother” He said. Thor’s eyes darted up to look at him, confused.

“What do you mean?”

“I see your spirit sink every time. I long for the day when I’ll be able to come at you announcing the doors to Asgard are open for you and we can return there together. But as things are now… You know I can't undo what our Father has decided. I believe I am only giving you false hopes. Maybe I should stop paying you these visits at all…”

“No!” Thor stood up, closing the distance between them to grab Loki’s shoulders. “You must not even say that! You… you are being so kind to me, way more than I deserve. I don’t know what would I do if I didn’t have the chance to see you, to talk of our home. It would drive me mad!”

“But what I am doing is only keeping you bound to a life that maybe you will never have anymore” Loki could see the pain flash into his brother’s clear eyes at the statement, and he softened his voice, let his own eyes wet with tears he felt easy to draw. “I can’t bear to see you suffering like this, brother”.

“I know. And I’m sorry for asking you to… but I need you to, my brother. I need you, Loki…”  
He looked so desperate. Loki revelled in that gaze, without letting even a fraction of his true feelings reach his eyes. He wanted to laugh, he wanted to mock Thor, he wanted to shout at him look! That’s what it means, having nothing and needing someone else so damn much! Feel it! _Feel it!_

He wanted to drink every drop of that desperation, like an exotic, intoxicating liquor.

Abruptly, he brought his head forward and pressed his lips against those of the man who wasn’t his brother, after all. He kissed him ferociously, almost biting, with a violence that surprised even himself. Thor let out a muffled sound, apparently too stunned to react. When Loki pulled back, his eyes were met with confused ones. Loki turned away and disappeared. 

-

A last act of chaos, and the curiosity to see where it would have brought Thor, Loki supposed. That was what it was all about, he reasoned.

-

One month was as long as he would have waited, this time. This time he went looking for Thor near the place where he worked, a building site. He had spent days imagining what would have happened, feeling excited at all the possibilities. He had played many possible meetings and conversations into his mind, wondering if he would have to test Thor’s need, threatening him to cut off his last tie to his home, in order to have him accept whatever was to come. Or if he would have to feign guilt, crying out loud his shame for such an unsensate action, and maybe let Thor reassure him that he wasn’t the one to blame…

But there was no need for any of that, no use for manipulation, for silver-tongue talking. As soon as Thor noticed the sharp-dressed man, he let go of whatever he was doing and went to talk to the man who looked in charge. Five minutes later, he and Loki were headed back home, the lack of talking curiously reminding Loki of unwelcome memories, times when their younger selves had shared long silences, playing together next to each other, comfortable with each other's presence. Times so far away they felt emptier that one of his lies.

As soon as the door closed behind their backs Loki grabbed the other man and kissed him again, hard and demanding, and this time Thor didn’t miss a beat answering the kiss with almost the same hunger, arms reaching around the thinnier frame, calloused fingers brushing the softer skin of Loki's cheeks, gentle and clumsy, like foolishly fearing the touch of a human could harm the flesh of a god. 

This wasn’t what Loki had foreseen. He had imagined he would have been the one in control, he had imagined he would have taken all the time to break Thor and savour this new defeat of his.

He had pictured him begging, pictured him in his power. Instead it was the once allmighty God of Thunder to yield, to offer himself, and Loki took all he could, pounding into his body as the other man was on all-four on the floor, muscles flexing under the skin of his back, the wet sound of skin against skin resonating around them, joining their mingled panting. When Thor tried to glance over his shoulder Loki caught his hair in what he hoped was a painful hold, pushing his head down, forcing him not to. He hadn’t felt himself so raw and exposed since the day he had lashed out at their father, after discovering the truth about himself. He wouldn’t allow Thor to see him like that. Instead he leaned down to bite him, mark him, and heard him moan as he reached his climax, and then held himself up for the god claiming his body. 

After, Thor let himself lay down on the floor, and Loki rested over his back, his thinner frame unable to cover the broader one of the other man. They breathed together, and Loki managed to collect himself, before Thor finally looked at him, sweated hair glued to his forehead and cheeks.

There was no question spoken aloud, this time.

-

_Will you come back?_

_I will._

-

Loki walked through the halls of the palace, his subjects respectfully lowering their heads as he passed by. He climbed the stairs to a tower, opening the doors to rooms and terraces he hadn’t visited since he was a child, his and Thor’s old playgrounds, where nobody else came. He leaned to a banister, as the memories of children playing hide and seek were replaced by the fleeting image of him and the God of Thunder, lying together there in a sanctuary of our own, their naked limbs entwined. The image of what could have been.

Back in the most magnificent hall of the palace, the King of Asgard sat on his throne, sulking, counting the days to his next visit to Midgard.


End file.
